If Microsoft built cars...

Top ten ways that life would be different if Microsoft built cars:

10. New seats would require everyone to have the same size butt.

9. We'd all have to switch to Microsoft Gas(tm).

8. The U.S. government would be GETTING subsidies from an automaker.

7. The oil, alternator, gas, and engine warning lights would be replaced by a single "General Protection Car Fault" warning light.

6. Sun Motorsystems would make a car that was solar-powered, twice as reliable, five times as fast, but would only run on 5% of the roads.

5. You would constantly be pressured to upgrade your car.

4. You could only have one person in your car at a time, unless you bought Car '95 or Car NT; but then you'd have to buy more seats.

3. Occasionally, your car would just die for no reason, and you'd have to restart it. For some strange reason, you would just accept this as normal.

2. Every time the lines on the road were repainted, you'd have to buy a new car.

1. People would get excited about the new features in Microsoft cars, forgetting completely (actually ignoring) that they had been available in other brands for years.

Page written by Matthew Darwin <matthew@mdarwin.ca>
12,854 hits since November 25, 2002