The Night Before Christmas

Twas the night before Christmas
and all through the house
Not a keyboard was stirring
not even a mouse.

The modem was placed
by the computer with care
In the hopes that some software
would be downloaded there.

Mamma with her CD
and I by her side
had just settled down
from a long airplane ride.

When out on the desk­top
there arouse such a clatter
I sprang to my feet
to see what was the matter.

Away to my Windows
I flew like a flash
Tossed off the dust covers
and turned on the fax

And what to my wondering
eyes did appear
But a high speed transmission
of downloaded cheer.

The bitmap of hoof prints
some awful old shtick
a hacker on the Internet
it must be Saint Nick.

Then up on the monitor
old Santa came on
He filled up my screen
then took off with a bound

His place looked like silicon
and used up five megs
But the color was calibrated
And the image hi­res.

He spoke not a byte
but went straight to his work
He filled all our hard drives
then turned with a jerk

And pointing his finger
just like Clark Kent
along came his jet and,
off the modem he went.

Then he sprang to his server
and to his team gave an E­mail
and away they all flew
like Mamma at a sale

"On Modems! On Faxes!
We're off to the malls!"
"More publicity photos
then dash away all."

And I heard him exclaim
as he logged off for the night
"Use San Jose Airport
and have a great flight!"

All credit goes to the San Jose Airport and their imaginative staff.

Page written by Matthew Darwin <>
2,082 hits since July 10, 1997